The Eulogy – Advice Needed!

I have been asked to speak at my best friends Fathers funeral next week, and I am extremely nervous about it.  I have never given a eulogy before and I know there are going to be a lot of people there, most of which I have known practically my entire life.  My friend and I met when I was 14 years old, she worked in the coffee shop where I got my first Saturday job, I am 53 now, so I would say she is my oldest friend.  Obviously I want to do an excellent job for my friend and her mother and all the grandchildren.  They are going to put together some memories for me to share and hopefully send me them in the next few days, so I can practice.  If anybody has done this before and can offer me any tips or advice, I would be so very grateful.

Thank you my lovely followers xxx


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33 thoughts on “The Eulogy – Advice Needed!

  1. That’s lovely of them to ask you to speak at the funeral … you must be very special to them. I’ve never spoken at a funeral, but I’ve written a eulogy for my husband to read at his brother’s funeral. It’s good that the family is sending you some of their memories for you to include – these will be important to them, so you’re off to a headstart. 😀 If there is enough time available, you could add a bit about what your friend’s dad meant to you. Collate the material and write it out as you would speak it. Take it with you to follow and look up at everyone regularly and smile at them if you’re able. Please don’t worry too much about it … warm memories with a little humour gives lots of comfort. I hope this helps.

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  2. What a precious and important honour – it speaks volumes of who you are that they have asked you to do this. I’ve never done anything like that so I have no advice except go with your heart. Previous speakers are giving what seems like awesome advice and if it were me who’d asked someone to speak of someone I love and had lost, I’d definitely want warm and humorous in there like ellem63 suggests. I’m sure you’ll find a great balance of the sombre and the lighter bits. Big hug, Anna

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  3. I’ve never given a eulogy, but I would give you this piece of advice. Be yourself. If you at any time feel nervous, let the people know that you are. Also, let them know how honored you are to have been asked because it is. I would also add, if you wear makeup, make sure it’s waterproof. 😀 ❤

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  4. It’s a sweet honor to be asked to write the eulogy. Having just heard several when President GWH Bush was buried, I noticed that humor really did add leavening to lighten up all of the natural sorrow that people were feeling. Hope you or the family have some lovely anecdotes to share.

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  5. Speak from the heart. Don’t write a speech…do an outline of what you’d like to say and let the memories flow. Be yourself. Wear comfortable shoes. Include personal anecdotes. Breath. You got this.

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  6. Wrote my sister’s eulogy in the car, on note cards as I had been taught in school. (She died unexpectedly) I thought I was ready..until I got to the church and was completely overwhelmed by emotion when I saw the little wooden box of ashes. When it was time to get up, I thought I might pass out on the spot but I I prayed for God to hold me steady so I could represent my sister well..It was a strange thing, almost a spiritual thing, but it was as if it was just Patty and me and no one else was there. It was her last important moment, her life, her story and I’m glad I was able to share it.

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  7. Keep it short and simple. Aim for 3 minutes, you’ll go over a little people need time to laugh at anything funny, you will need time to keep yourself together- it’s ok to shed a tear whilst giving the eulogy. Best wishes.

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