I am not sure why, or when it started – but my Sister absolutely hates me and it appears to consume her.
Some years ago she decided that I was lying about my husband being exposed to Chicken Pox. She had just given birth to her third child, and we were unable to visit her and the baby due to my husband having been in a meeting at work with a woman who, the next day, was diagnosed with it. So obviously we told her the problem and why we had to stay away for two weeks. Well there was a near riot, she went ballistic, called us liars and many other things I don’t care to publish. It was so out of the blue, I was convinced she must be having post natal depression. I think I was wrong as she didn’t speak to me for the next ten years.
Four years ago our Mother died. In the weeks just before her death my Sister starting getting in touch, short texts etc.. She lives 600 miles away from us all, so I was thinking she was wanting to heal the rift because of Mum and wanted to keep up with how Mum was doing.
As time went by she would telephone sometimes and we even met up for lunch a few times, she appeared to be over her problem with me, which I am still in the dark about. But for the sake of peace I never brought it up.
My Father sold his house last week and has been asking us if we want this and that, bits of furniture etc.. Sadly there isn’t much of my Mums left, as written in my previous blog about betrayal, he got rid of everything immediately Mum passed away and moved in with his mistress. My Sister is bitter about that and if I am honest so am I, so she won’t come and visit to see what she would like from the house. I offered to take photos and send them to her and then we could discuss who would like what, I thought that was only fair. Then it all went haywire – she asked about a light, which my Dad gave me a couple of years ago, I had always admired it and he offered it, so I said yes. I did not feel at all guilty as he gave my Sisters daughter my mums very nice car and my Sister got a huge and very valuable diamond ring, my mum had actually willed it to her daughter, but my Sister decided to caretake it, had it resized immediately and now wears it herself. I never said a word to her or my Dad, but it was hurtful. My Sister didn’t visit my Mum for a year after her Cancer diagnosis, I went by every week and near the end, every day.
When I told her I had the light she went ballistic (it’s about 30 years old and worth nothing, just sentimental to me). The stream of abusive texts were unbelievable, she was incandescent with rage, accused me of plundering all that was left, that I was deceitful, vile and much, much worse. I sent a reply saying I was sorry she felt that way and please tell me what she thinks I have taken?, this made her worse, and she didn’t answer the question, which she couldn’t, because I haven’t been to my Fathers house in a year, nor has he given me anything other than a small glass sweetie bowl, value – zero.
I won’t be answering anymore of her abusive, cruel and disgusting texts and I doubt I will have anything more to do with her. I like peace. I like a quiet life. She can have the entire house contents for all I care. It’s not worth my peace being shattered and my life being torn apart by her all over again.
I have asked friends why they think she hates me? All have known her as long as me. All said the same thing, she is a green eyed monster who is jealous to her bones of the loving and close relationship I had with my Mother. Perhaps if she hadn’t stayed away for years on end, if she had worked at being close to her, she would be a nicer person. My Mother made a point of never favouring one of us over the other, so I guess it will always remain a mystery as to why my only Sister hates me so much.
“You will not be punished for your anger, you will be punished by your anger.”
“Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned.”